Day 81: October 29, 2013 – thankful it’s not me

Someone told me a story that I cannot share. All I can say is, I’m thankful it didn’t happen to me.

Day 56: October 4, 2013 – equilibrium

It’s early in the day, and I haven’t even been out yet. But a combination of things from the last few days has pointed me to what I’m most thankful for today.

For most of my life, I was not a truly happy person. Yeah, I was happy, but…. I always thought a change in circumstance would make me an even happier person. “If I had a better job….” or “If my relationship with … would just get better…” or any number of if’s and’s or maybe’s… And I would hear people talk about being happy just as things are, and someone would tell me to be happy just being myself. And I didn’t get it. “Of course they are happy, they don’t have any drama in their lives. Me, *I* have drama in my life. If only I didn’t have drama, I’d be much happier…..” Can you believe there was a time whenI thought like that? And it wasn’t all that long ago.

I’ve had to learn a lot of lessons in life more than once, because they just didn’t take the first time. But I think I’ve assembled everything finally into the proper mental equilibrium. I can handle what the Universe throws at me and still, deep down inside, be happy. Is it easy? No. Am I courting disaster? Hell no. But I know some disaster is just biding its time, waiting to make itself known to my world. And when it comes, I will roll with the punches. Or as REO Speedwagon said, I’ll roll with the changes.

No one particular event led me to this realization today. There are people close to me struggling with things right now. Some things are known to me, some things I only suspect. None of it directly impacts me, other than knowing that people I love are struggling with the changes in their lives… it’s hard to see them struggle. But I make it known that I am here to offer support if necessary. And the reason I’m able to offer comfort to a friend is that I’ve found equilibrium myself. I’m no longer walking on a path of quicksand.

I spent most of my free time the last three nights working on organizing the files in my backup hard drive so I could copy them to a second drive for protection. Those files have the last twelve years of my digital life. And there has been a lot of growth for me in that decade plus…. I’m sure glad that I’ve grown in that time. I’m not finished growing either, and never will be. But the one thing I can say with 100% confidence is, I am going to be happy, no matter what comes my way. I have found equilibrium. I am happy within my own skin.

So today, I’m thankful for the feeling of inner peace that I have found. I’m thankful for the drama free world I’ve shaped around myself and the people who populate that world. And I’m thankful for balance… and equilibrium.

Day 43: September 21, 2013 – giving something back

Today, I’m thankful for the chance to help give back to a group of kids who I will never meet. I did 58 sun salutations yesterday in Whetstone Park to help raise money for and awareness of Yoga Gangsters, an organization that helps at-risk youth by teaching them yoga techniques to help them manage stress. Candy runs the Columbus chapter of this wonderful organization that her sister founded in Miami several years ago. I forget the exact amount that Candy raised… I’m still amazed that she could add the numbers so quickly in her head last night… she did 108 sun salutations and had to be much more tired than I was…. but the total was almost $1200! BY HERSELF! But several of us were there to support her, including Liz who did all 108 with her. We had a great time in spite of the lack of sun, presence of rain, and declining temperature… I’m also thankful for Beth, who let me wear one of her jackets while I was keeping the count and shooting the first photos. It felt great to be a part of something that will help our community and some of the overlooked kids who live here.

Candy is on the far right, leading us in sun salutations. Yes, that’s me, second from the right, and yes I did take off my socks during the second set of ten…. 🙂

Day 15: August 24, 2013 – Hot air and cheeseburgers

First let me say that halfway through this morning, I realized hot air balloons are filled with HOT AIR and not helium. Yes, I am not sure either where that idea came from.

Today I have many things large and small to be thankful….

In chronological order (mostly):

• I didn’t die in the accident that blocked part of I-270 on my way to meet Mike and Renee (I saw it out of the corner of my eye, two lanes over. A guy swerved into my lane to avoid it. Whew.) Rule #1 = “Don’t die.”
• Mike and Renee chose me to include in their anniversary celebration, because Mike wanted me to see Cold War Kids.
• CD102.5 Summerfest was a great show, even though we were almost knocked off our feet numerous times by crowd surfers and drunk, high, disrespectful teenagers
• the random girl who wanted a bottle of water so bad, she fought her way through the crowd and back, and bought us waters too because we held enough space in the crowd for her. We were all about to pass out from dehydration.

But most of all, in this moment, I am thankful for this Single Bacon Cheeseburger with Mayonnaise and Ketchup Only from Wendy’s that I’m about to eat before I shower and take my tired ass to bed.,